La Liberación

Last night was our department Christmas party. It went well and all had a good time, but that's not why I called you here today.

As I was getting ready, I thought back to this same party last year, when I had a 6 week old baby. I was a liberated woman. We left Levi with my parents for the evening (first time), and I left house in a NON nursing bra (another first). I allowed myself one tiny glass of wine, and ended the night with full boobs. Freedoms all around! Right? Right???! (holds hand up to Evan for high five)


Fast forward to this year. I have a 13 month old. I wear whatever bra I want. LJB actually SPENDS THE NIGHT with my parents. I have more wine and less boobs. We pick the kid up in the morning, and within an hour he is snuggling and ready for his nap. (actually receives high five from Evan)

I want 2009 Linda and 2010 Linda to hang out together for a couple of hours.

2009 Linda simply has no idea how much change happens within 1 year. I want to tell 2009 Linda that it only totally sucks (which it totally did) for so long, and that it gets DRASTICALLY better with this child. 2010 Linda can buy 2009 Linda a drink (just one, mind you), fix her a sandwich, and then fold mountains of laundry in the 2009 laundry room. All the while, reminding her that real freedom is just 1 tiny year away.

Back Atcha

Would you like to know one of my pet peeves?

Dormant blogs.

If I’ve invested the time and energy into becoming obsessed with your writing, the very least you can do is write something awesome. On every single day of your life. Preferably with picture and/or video accompaniment. And a cool background so I don’t get bored.

Can’t do it? Well, as it turns out, neither can I.

Here are some things I've wanted to write about in the past 10 months since I peed my pants in February. (Side note - you will be happy to know that has all stopped.)

Baby cows

Pancakes

Poopy pants (Levi’s, not mine.)

Skinny jeans

Consignment stores

Baby food

Levi crawling

Levi standing

Lots of mentioninings of Levi doing something cute

Amy Grant’s Home for Christmas album. (more of a thanks to all who remained friends with me in the early 90’s in spite of aforementioned album)

Hair removal creams

Scandalous toe polish color names

Post-nursing boobs

Superheroes

So. Let's just forget about these past 10 months of silence, and instead pretend that I wrote a killer set of blog entries on the above subjects, chock-full of witticisms and JUST the right amount of word plays. So you'll all be thinking stuff like...

"You're right, Linda! That WAS a cute story about Levi!"

"Pink Fornicarnation?! That IS a silly nail polish color! You so crazy."

"So does the cream remove ALL the hair from your belly button?"

And so on. Don't you feel refreshed? I know I do.

While we're here, I should note that another pet peeve of mine is when people put up their "I'M BACK!" blog post proclamation, and then proceed to immediately disappear again for another number of months.

I will do my best not to do this. I will do my best to say interesting things, and do so on a somewhat regular basis. Thanks for sticking with me.